do you think they make "congratulations unfit mother" greeting cards?
or abortion recommendation cards.
I forgot how hot balto sounded
I am wasted and people are fist pumping. This should not happen on the west coast.
I'm gonna answer everything she says with 'cum on da face' until she breaks up with me...great idea or greatest idea?
So am I a slut for not remembering his name after sex last night or not recognizing him in the cafe today after he told me who he was?
we fucked the fort apart but we'll rebuild it after we get some drinks.
When you awake you'll realize that your car is missing....just know that I had it and becuz of your car I hooked up with the hot bar tender that looks like that guy from bay-watch however I parked it in a loading zone and it was towed...that sex was TOTALLY worth it love you
You know what i just remembered? I asked the 8 ball if i was gonna get kicked out this semester before any of this stuff happened and it said yes. ITS REAL.
You have no idea how pumped I am. I literally plan on dying. You're in my will
i think god would be more upset with me for turning down such a beautifully crafted cock than he would for me liking girls
We smoked bowls and watched Cops for what seemed like hours. And yet I know I'll go back.
I've just had two stress filled days in a row , I'm just going to shower and await your penis
Bring me your tired, your weary, your buffalo chicken dip
9 am booty call on your ex's birthday. Fuck yea
just spent the last 20 minutes cleaning out the soap dispenser. fuck. me. adderall.
Randomize