That's why Kanye is a gay fish.
Let's roleplay tonight. I'll be drunken diva and you be sexy sober.
IF that's your way of making me dd then count me out.
Do you understand how much easier life would be if fannypacks were normal
I'm also annoyed at my horoscope for not warning me of my perils
all nice guys are gay and all hot ones are assholes
You're fat. Stop making excuses
OMG A WOMANS PROSTETIC ARM JUST FELL OFF AT BAGGAGE CLAIM
Just made a photo collage of the girls I've hooked up with this summer. I'm patting myself on my back right now
Considering showing up at your house with coronas. I'll be wearing a sombrero and that's it.
Party city is having a sale on maracas
She had one unshaved part on her vagina that she called "the soul patch" I just didn't know what to think
I'm sure me singing - rather loudly - "fuck me in the back seat" last night didn't help either.
They usually take it with their boobs. It's like a horizontal motorboat
Lube filled water balloons always make for a good time
His face matches his life choices. Both are train wrecks.
just had an allergic reaction to my dildo. My life is ruined.
..and by hang out i don't mean fucking then going back home i mean let's get something to eat & watch a movie and fuck sometime in between.
Randomize
