im pretty sure i tried to attack the vending machine last night
lol who won
well im in the hospital right now so u tell me
just so you know, the whole club saw your tits last night. and booed.
They were so slutty we had to play "rarely have I ever."
i finally found my car by the hideout. it was parked in an employee only parking space with a torn up piece of paper in the back window with the word employee scribbled on it.
her idea of "friends with benefits" is her doing my laundry. i'm cool with it.
Also I hooked up with a trainer at my gym. Between her, the married chick, and the bartender, my life is becoming a bad porn plot.
The bridesmaid just threw up on herself. This is going to be the best wedding ever
Idk every story shes told me thats started with "back when i was a lesbian" has been my new favorite story
Highlight of the weekend: getting roundhouse kicked in the dick while switching from reverse cowgirl.
I've had to take two showers today and it's not even 1 o'clock. Why won't this weekend wash off?
he's been dating her for 18 months and cheating on her with me for 16. if that's not commitment, i don't know what is.
What happened lastnight it looks like I had sex with edward scissor hands....my back is so messed up
my bad i broke a mirror over your back
After the 2nd person threw up, you told us that your 'mint shooters' were just shots of mint mouthwash
So learned a new trick last night.... Taking body shots from my own tits... Mom would be so proud
I could hear it slapping against his thighs under the robe!!!!!!!!! You are a lucky girl!
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