don't you miss dr. quinn: medicine woman? i do.
I just saw a woman point to her daughter and scream at her husband THIS IS YOUR GENES, THIS IS YOU.
Of course she said it wasn't that good, I don't bring my A game to pity fuck the thrice divorced girl from work
I don't really see how asking you not to cum on my face or hair makes me high maintenance
i just like, need to vent to someone
Can we skip the part where I pretend to care and fast forward to the appreciative blowjob from you?
The real reason I can't work: it's Tuesday. I get stoned and watch Buck Rodgers on Tuesday.
I don't have to hold her hair back as she blows me but I do have to hold the ball on the Santa hat
He said he looked out his window and I was sitting in the grass with blood everywhere talking to a dog.
We're snowed in with only two condoms. This will literally be valentines day russian roullette.
We were on a plane, I couldn't just grab his dick
My hangover didn't kick in until like 4pm so I found myself puking in the middle of Times Square. During rush hour. In a three piece suit. A spongebob came by and patted me on the back.
Of course I'm watching space shows while stoned on the science channel. Why would I want to learn while not baked out of my skull?
I don't know, we got really drunk and I slapped her with an ear of corn.
It's a shame things ended how they did. We were well on our way to transforming from acquaintances with benefits to friends with benefits.
His dick is social distance approved
Social distance approved?
big enough for me to fuck from six feet away
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