He looks too sensitive, like he's going to write me a poem and cry after the first time we have sex.
How can i ever say i miss u when u wont go away
i dunno what you eat but your cum is all over my underwear and it smells like pretzels
Just got a message from a guy on a dating site who says he helped me remove lime pulp from my eye in a club toilet 2 weeks ago.
Thanks for alerting everyone in our apartment what your one night stand's name is. Could you scream a little louder?
Remind me in the morning that I've now seen a guy do crack. That actually happened. I'm at the wrong party.
I`m watching Shallow Hal & Jack Black has better nipples than Jimmy's chick.
That was the second worst thing to happen to my asshole.
Asking me to suck on my nipples isn't going to make me less mad at you.
your penis is a great and majestic leader among the penises.
It's been 12 hours since I have heard from you and social media has given me no indication you are anything but dead, so that's what I'm going with.
So if I run into you on the street, I'm supposed to just stop drop and suck your dick?
can you come here so we can have really loud sex? the girl upstairs walks so loud i want her to know how it feels
of course
So if my boyfriend and I hooked up with the same girl it’s not like I cheated. It’s communal.
Have you ever gotten such awesome underwear you wish you didnt have to wear pants?
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