i just threw up ON my final. epic way to end the semester.
Like reprimanding the wall for "sneaking up on me" drunk
Dude, at this rate we're going to get arrested a second time tonight.
What a good family we'd make, him and I and our kids and his good dick.
i think i can safely say that is the weirdest thing you've ever propositioned me with. so obviously my answer is yes.
My three rules on what I'm wearing tonight. Something short, something see through, and something i had sex in.
After she saw a msg in his phone from me that listed the reasons why I love his cock, I don't think I can deny fucking her ex.
Jacked up my neck and shoulder hanging on for dear life while I rode him like a boss. Plus my house smells like broccoli, bad! How's YOUR morning?
At 2pm we are having a MANDITORY house meeting about last night. ALL must be in attendance!
I'd like to review the planning and execution of the party to determine how we hosted a naked party, to determine how we can have more.
Thank you for the legal advice. I hope I can pay you in blow jobs.
Let's just says his mouth writes a lot of checks that his penis just can't cash. Don't waste your time.
I have no inclination to even want to think about what God's existential meltdown is going to be like. O.o
THIS MOTHERFUCKING ROOSTER
IT KEEPS CHASING ME BACK IN THE HOUSE
FUCK THIS BIRD
i'm sitting in bed scratching my boobs and wearing a sparkly fedora and have no one to blame but myself
Its not that hard to understand he's my holiday boyfriend, we ignore each other most of the year except on holidays when I give him head
Randomize