I've decided through careful research we can out drink any country folk.
I JUST GOT MY PERIOD AND MY VISA FOR LONDON GOT APPROVED! BEST DAY EVER!
we should become lesbians. not together. just in general.
I should just tell him this. He doesn't need to be all nice and ask me on dates and to do gay stuff like hangout during the day. I'll still sleep with him regardless.
did you come by the house last night? I found a half eaten corn dog in the mail box.
I'm on my way, but at some point we're going to have to settle who gave who crabs the last time
Just bought a waterproof mattress cover. Bring it on sophomore year.
I tried to get you a girl. They want us to cook breakfast though
Lolll I'll be sleeping
I'm practically buying you a 1 way ticket to pound town.
I feel like just to watch it, I need to be high. To understand it, I'd need enough drugs to kill an elephant.
I feel like we should at least be hungover if we're gonna be this grown up.
Well you finally jumped into that tree you've always wanted into and some girl gave you an 8.5. You were very happy.
He told me that he'd ride his snowmobile from Cincinnati to Toledo in this blizzard just so I could give him head.
But on the bright side the arresting officer was just as hot as I remember and I took a pretty okay mugshot.
Best night if my life? Time I got eaten out in the backseat of a M5 while eating White Castle. Then he fucked me. Perfect
the coup got in the way of sex but inauguration day came thru we did it joe
Randomize
