What you up to?
Having coffee. Getting eyefucked. Eyefucking.
Full throttle
Some guys are relationship guys. Not our niche.
I FOUND THE PROF I'M GOING TO FUCKKKK.
I'm sitting the next couple hours out. Puking in a potted plant really put shit into perspective for me.
I'm pretty sure it all started going downhill last night when they suggested I see how much sambuca I could fit in my mouth
Where are you? This girl fell on a baby. She is just gone. Please Hurry
I'm hurrying
Dude. She just shit herself.
Did we almost burn down the bar last night? I guess flaming shots were a bad idea.
He wanted me to blow him while he did curls and looked at himself in the mirror. Not sure if gay or ego maniac.
I'm not going to say what I did. You're smart enough to figure it out. But I did it. And you owe me 20$
i dont get why youre mad at me. i promised you he looked like jim morrison and you failed to ask me like which era
You kept sacrificing me last night. You would just yell out "Virgin Sacrifice!!" and then throw me into a circle of men.
I feel like Captain Morgan shit all over my hopes and dreams last night...
I had cheese pancakes which is pretty much just melting cheese in a frying pan and then eating it except youre in denial that your life is a wreck
I masterbated to his instagram page. Too far or....?
Did you clean my apartment?
I thought it was a dream, I'm sorry
Please stay more often
You microwaved all of my silverware, I don't care if you spent all your money on tequila, you're paying for this.
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