You give one guy a hand job and suddenly everyone wants to get with you
We went out. i got lost. dunno where they were. they slept in the car. i slept in an outdoor shower. i dont know anything else.
Do you remember anything yesterday that led to needing a cup of couscous in my closet?
All my credit cards need to be pressure washed
I should not be in class today. For the professors sake.
From the guy that lifted you into a fan I'm sorry
Apparently I yelled "no stop it" in my sleep last night when he tried to cuddle with me.
Oops, guess its official. I just use him for sex.
There's always a certain something about a day that begins with your panties in your purse.
No she probably looked into my aura and saw that my penis would ruin her.
Can I get that on a shirt
So I got my junk pierced since we've fucked. You should get in on this.
Your life has no conflict it's just a blur of sex and Netflix
His condition for us having sex was that I wore my show boots. #equestrianproblems
Who the fuck is "nick from the beach last year"
No idea hahaha...why?
He just texted me.. Should I ask where I met him?
Told a guy at the bar I was hurricane evacuees with no place to stay. Just woke up at his place. God bless Florence
I swear my vagina needs to be taken away from me when I drink.
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