plz talk dirty to me
respond to me or i'm telling everyone that you inserted a vodka soaked tampon into your anus
you were so drunk you slurred your pauses
i just used burnetts to get spraypaint off the floor of my dorm lobby
I'm missing my class because I'm not done with my beer
my bedside table was not meant to hold this many beer bottles.
Oh, and no balcony sex...trust me.
The least you could do before I go into your room is throw away the condom wrapper from the other girl I know you're banging.
I guess I fell on the bar and kept trying to get back in telling the bouncer that I left my teeth at the bar. Woke up this morning with chipped tooth
Also, as my manager i'm going to put you in charge of making sure i don't drown.
Idk man, she was drunker than me and i was sitting there talking to a raccoon about it's broken leg.
I just remember looking over and seeing you on top of him and us high fiving. That's when I knew we'd be perfect roommates
You should help rebuild my confidence with your dick. Altruism: Pass it on.
Well we can add this to the list of 'where the hell did that bruise come from?'
we've talked on the toilet we're linked now
Randomize
