you want my honest opinion? I'm sure refering to her vagina as the "bat cave" was your first mistake.
Best moment of my life. I just got a text from some random number that said i can't wait to touch you. Her name is kiara and she had the wrong number.
It feels like Jesus smacked me in the face with the new testament for drinking so much last night
Need to stop getting stoned with this chick, I keep waking up covered in pizza sauce
Well i tried snorting sugar. so either that made me puke or the fact that i drank water from a fish tank
He showed up drunk to my cousions HS grad party, we stayed at the bars till 2, then he got up at 5 to run a half marathon and by the time I woke up wlhe was already back and drinking.
Wanna skype?
Can your lips gently and pleasantly suck on my balls via skype? If not, then no.
His morals are debatable, but his heart or perhaps his penis is in the right place.
His penis is crooked. Right place? Maybe he starts there, but then he slants.
YOUR DICK HAS BEEN IN ME I DO NOT WANT TO BE SET UP TO MEET YOUR FRIENDS
Well, you're 18 and dating a 28 year old. Who has a wife. Who isn't you. I would guess that's why your mom frowns upon the relationship.
Every time I download Tinder again, I hate myself a little more.
I'm setting goals and achieving them. I'd say I'm quite mature for my age.
You're goal was to fuck him and you don't even remember it.
She bruised my penis again. But, trooper I am we kept on going.
That wasn't even sex. That was a fuckoning
...did you just create a word for what we did?
Well now I’m in the bathroom puking up absinthe so guess I beat myself up over it one way or the other
Randomize
