I dont abuse you, i just hit you while we have sex
The walk of shame is so much worse when you've spent the night third wheeling.
My wife all of the sudden got markedly better at giving blow jobs. Should I be happy or concerned?
I just hope this isn't happening Final Destination style
Travis Barker would totally be Devon Sawa in this scenario
just found his boxers balled up inside my tights, hidden in my freezer. damn i love college.
areolas are like halos for boobs.
i have now been nicknamed the screamer on the first, third, fourth, & six floor by all the ra's. only two more floors to go before i cover the entire dorm.
I wish the ER had shaved that part of my head. It would be easier to show people my staples at the bar.
This hot topless Jamaican just ran down the st with me on his back and He was screaming "I be stealing yo white ladies."
I don't know if i should be jealous or worried... or question where you are.
Why on earth is he slamming his body into the wall again?
She's barefoot and topless screaming "HERE KITTY-KITTY" at a stray cat in the ditch on the side of the highway. How do I get her back in the car?
Since you're going to wake up and see one bajillion missed calls from me, I just want you to know that's a perfectly reasonable number. Now come downystairs.
There are grandparents doing keg stands I don't know
We had a One Night Stand 6 months ago but he just Facebook invited me to his wedding. Who the fuck does that.
don't take this the wrong way, but I'm not drunk but I need you to take me to the ER and you're the most likely to not be drunk now.
Randomize
