Who was more unwelcome: The two of us at the party last night, or Kimmy Gibler at the Tanner residence?
Is it sad that when she told me he has a small peen I felt like it made us more compatible?
so would me posting the photos of the cock and coin jar incident be completely out of the question?
I woke up to you in just boxers at my door at 7a.m. with you saying how many squrriels you counted on the walk back, then you made me penis shaped pancakes
We made the bar tender tell us how he proposed to his girlfriend. In detail. While we made gushing noises. We are embarrassments to females everywhere
This is the high leading the old right now
Eye surgery went well. Just can't believe it took getting lasers through my eyes to temporarily stop the vivid sex dreams I was having
From the same High Brittany who brought you such thoughts as, "Fuck, am I wearing shoes?" Comes High Brittany on a date! Stay tuned. This will be interesting.
I don't know what happened this summer, I've lost my sense of morality. All I do now is work, get drunk, and have sex near national landmarks.
I slapped him but he didn't wake up. He just nuzzled my head, hugged me closer, and smiled.
He fell asleep cradling my ass and every time I moved he adjusted his hand accordingly. I've found the one.
Last night you dunked donut holes in spinach dip, ate it, threw up, and continued eating. I cant keep up with your drunk eating skills.
I was wondering where the donuts went.
what could you have possibly accomplished by watching 6 hours of a mythbusters marathon
well, i added sex in a wind tunnel to my bucket list
Woke up to find my underwear in my purse to only remember I took them off at the airport
if they didn't want us to do blow at uni, why would they make textbooks so smooth?
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