It took him longer to undo my bra than he lasted..
Totally saw a hot amputee. I think this is called character growth.
i cant belive i got a ticket! i know what his dick tastes like!
I just found a video on my phone from last night of you yelling, "you can't fuck me!" at least 20 times
Ok! I picked up an anti-celebratory bottle of champagne on the way to dinner for her going to rehab. That's how I feel about this...
I woke up at 4 am. Literally pissed. No idea what happened. I could have fucked a cow.
Are there any rules against fucking the hot TA?
Maybe for her....
Her problem, not mine
Just don't let me get too drunk. At one point I pulled out my dick and pissed at that party. Like on the wall.
The highlight of the trip was definitely my dad telling me that I "used to be his prettiest daughter."
What can I say I sleep with 40 year old Cougars because my mother gave me away at birth and apparently that's why says my therapist
I still can't believe that dog licked my nipple.
I've got five complains from the landlord about she being too loud during sex in two weeks I'm marrying her
Got my client divorced finally. He was even awarded the cat ashes. Yep I went to law school for this.
Apparently I thanked the paramedics over and over again for saving the "happy new year" beads that I was wearing
I've got two reasons for you to come over later and one of them is pierced.
Randomize
