I cannot stress to you how much better your current situation is than listening to gay sex
Dude manswers just said that a guy can only cum up to eight times in one day. I'm gonna prove that show wrong.
ha well at least you have goals.
i can't, i'm blowing bubbles in class and getting credit for it
That's because you're a slut. A slut fucking a fence.
slow down on the beer.. we don't need another pentabong projectile hot dog incident
the condom is still stuck, that's what I get for being responsible
Fun fact of the day: Our cat does not like rum.
I'm not taking advise from someone who responded to the pickup line "I have a penis"
I told him if he cums in my mouth he has to buy me a cake that says "sorry I came in your mouth"
Your friend gave me you're number. I was the guy locked behind the book shelf.
I think you have the wrong number, but I hope you escaped your library-prison?
Oh no. Did you guys fuck on my pull out couch?
never planned on seeing last weekend's one night stand again, much less be on the same plane as him..
Can't believe we're making vacation plans with the guy we had a threesome with
Just woke up next to a hungry lesbian and a half eaten croissant on my stomach. Can you come get me?
I would give away three of my own ribs to be able to eat myself out.
...ew
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