I dont know how to say this. But the hottest girl where im at has one arm.
She just told me her legs are numb and that she dedicated her karaoke of ice ice baby to her 4 month old son.
Bren left me with a lovely parting gift. Newfouund alcoholism. I'm on the kitchen floor, hugging a bottle of vodka. It's my only friend now.
The Vegas crew is in two groups, Team Vodka and Team Fireball. There is no winner in this.
he told her he was actually impressed that she had fucked more people in this house than the four dudes living in it.
well i mean she can't stop a weed based friendship...its like a trying to stop a bomb or a really fast train...
GET OVER HERE. HOTTIE ALERT
^^^This is why you should have charged your phone prior to going out.
Best feeling in the world is getting a random boob pic from a drunk chick at 3 am.
I totally intended to come to the hotel, but I woke up in a parking lot
The struggle is real.
I know. His dick was small at the top and got bigger at the bottom, like a fucking curling wand.
I have loved her ever since she went down on my first wife
YAY! I just removed my own stitches, and I'm only bleeding from one spot! on a related note, do you think a dishwasher will sterilize forceps and trauma shears?
I was eating pickles straight from a jar, contemplating doing something productive. What did I miss?
Congratulations! We have a period
just showered sitting down cuz standing seemed like too much work, thursdays need to stop making me their bitch.
Randomize
