god. i hate danny gokey.
Hes like the kid in school that reminds the teacher they forgot to assign homeowrk.
he's mormon right? lame.
I mean he's a cool ass guy, but he's genuinely in love with a fat chick. I just can't take him seriously as a person.
What a good family we'd make, him and I and our kids and his good dick.
Nobody knew what to do when it was dead. You said fire up the George Foreman, I've never ate baby shark. She hasn't stopped crying.
Call me when you wake up. I wanna start drinking but I'm giving up hope on my life if I drink alone before 10 am
I told her I named my penis "The Spirit of Exploration." That's all it took.
We were walking home from Pluckers (read carrying your drunk ass) and out of nowhere you yelled "Say bitch you got a Facebook?" at a random chick walking by.
90 seconds of pumping and 2 months of bragging all summer. So much for my reputation here.
I left him on his mom's lawn after he passed out in my lap and told me my vagina smells like flowers. Couple of the year award
We just fucked each other sober. #goteam
Pumped to get "pass out-wake up in Berlin-buy a chinchilla" drunk?
Listen, I just paid for a hotel room, so I didn't have to have sex in his car. I'm adulting successfully.
Also this morning I remembered seeing the stripper he threw up on later in the night. She was clothed though.
Just make sure you put pants on
....then im not going
When God closes one door, he opens up a taller, smarter, more successful door, with a bigger cock and nicer teeth.
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