Is Jonathan Taylor Thomas a gay? I need you to google search it for me. Its important
can you come get me at the bar
ill be there in 10 min
can we stop off at build a bear on the way home
no one should ever give us hovercrafts
you fucking puked into the top of the beer bong while i was chugging from it. when i realized i was chugging your vomit, i vomitted on the floor. she kicked us both out.
I've never had someone so bad at kissing. It was like he was trying to block my airway with his tongue and he succeeded...
somebody should make me the poster child for not drinking everclear..
I just wrote a love letter to my weed and texted it to my cousin. I can't say it any differently. It happened.
It's important to establish I slept with her BEFORE we officially became cousins-in-law.
Just reintroduced tequila back into my life...so that's happening
YAS SHES BACK AND BETTER THAN EVER
I just watched videos of people getting puppies and crying, I cried too. Definitely still drunk
I found a new button on my vibrator, tonight was a success
Is there a single word to describe 'the last guy she slept with before meeting her husband'? Cause there should be.
does 2pm fall under the wake n bake category?
don't take offense to this but at the strip club tonight I legit believed one girl was you. almost hopped on stage and freaked out at you. you're a beauty.
he went down on me and a few minutes later he asked to show me a magic trick. then he pulled a quarter out of my vagina
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