i'm almost one hundred percent positive that i have a warrant out for my arrest in this city. i also don't give a fuck because im drinking TEQUILAAAA
You know I'm really starting to enjoy being everyones first gay experience
I had his cock in my mouth and he still wouldn't shut up about Star Wars.
I just watched nsync videos for the past half hour and you could totally tell lance bass was gay in all of them
I woke up with glitter in my wounds.
Don't ask me how, but I have a squirrel in my backpack and I don't know what to do with it.
I just stabbed open a can of Spaghetti Os with a spork. Who says I cant take care of myself?
I only see on penis in this picture but I assume there is another lurking out of sight.
He said he doesnt believe in the female orgasm,so no I did not have sex with him.
Do you think the police would frown on me opening a psych drug pharmacy on the side? Just to dispose of my drugs without polluting the water supply! It is for the animals!
Pro tip: if you can avoid puking on your carpet, do so. Cleaning it up is absolutely no fun at all.
"Nobody needs to know that I have a vibrating butt plug and nobody needs to know that I'm probably gonna start wearing it at work"
im gonna shove his purity ring down his throat
He fingerfucked me in the hot tub and then we had sex in the wine cellar. See thats why I like partying with rich people
Our faces when the strip club was closed looked like the grinch just stole Christmas ☹️
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