I never noticed this but I have a beauty mark on my labia minora
Please tell me how you discovered this.
I was looking in the mirror snooping around
They're drinking Schnapps out of Spaghetti-o's cans. Please come pick me up.
you refused to leave the drive-thru at mcdonalds until the cashier took a jello shot
we put the last xanax in the middle and played hungry hungry hippos to see whod get it
fair is fair
Good to know: if a hot girls asks to go back to my place, she probably just needs to vomit all over my bathroom
i feel like his penis is a security blanet. i cant fall asleep unless its in my hand
I feel like we're taking advantage of the fact that our R.A has cerebal palsey.
every time fb tells me a dude i fucked is now friends with another dude ive fucked, i die a little inside. thats way more honesty than im comfortable with.
I guess, just don't make it awkward
MY FUCK BUDDY'S MOTHER FRIEND REQUESTED ME! IT'S ALREADY AWKWARD COREY
We waved. But it was a "let's hook up" wave.
I talk a lot when I drink rum. he was going down on me and i was telling him how i wished i could tap dance. oh god
Funny story... I got into my car and my porn started playing over my Bluetooth.
just walked passed a black light...apparently he DID cum.
As we were walking to her place she stole a pizza from the delivery guy's car and when we got home she grabbed a slice, two beers, removed her pants, and said "call of duty?" im going to marry her
If there's someone that knows accidental pantlessness, it's Mike.
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