Do you know how when animals have surgery they put those cones around their heads so they can't lick their wounds so they can heal? I think someone should invent that for human emotions.
So you refered to him as "monster dick"...not so much
dude, I'm watching paul blart mall cop. I have better things to do than listen to you whine about your recent divorce.
I sent her a Relationship Request on Facebook last night, she accepted and we fucked.. I changed my Relationship Status to Single, I think she'll get the point
Just realized after we're done pre-gaming for St. Patricks Day, we have March Madness, the first day of spring, and Easter to pre-game for. March is a great month.
The cops just drove by on their loudspeaker going DO NOT DRINK THE WATAHH
I love boston
2010 has been the year of the Eskimo brother. Let's see how many igloos we can shack in next year
The dumpster is full of naked people swimming. I'm going to join.
My liver and I thought we knew what we signed up for. We were wrong.
I was scared I had HIV after last time so I'm not gonna do it again
But he was really hot
Glad you don't have HIV
Halloween is the end of the singles holidays they don't start again until st. Patrick's day we better get wifed up or it's going to be a long winter lol
i dont know the whole gay terminator look is really hot on him
Did you get your nipples pierced? I felt something poking through my shirt earlier and I really didn't want to say anything in front of your grandma...
Maybe those shots of hot dog water wasn’t a good idea after killing a fifth of tequila.. but who’s askin
I went with vodka instead of tequila tonight so I make better decisions. Fool proof plan.
Randomize
