You guys sftrill at mcdondalds?!!!!
Yes.
fuckin bring me a cheseburgeria
Saw a pregnant woman get a lap dance last night. I love the south.
I told my mom I had sex with him and even SHE was proud. Now that's saying something.
Because when I say 'You shouldn't drink anymore', she hears, 'I personally challenge you to chug 3 more mixed drinks'
ive realized i need to start an "avoid moving in with my parents after graduation" fund
I will probably be peed on at some point today.
Best part of having a window in your office is that you can leave through it when you shit your pants at work.
I had him autograph the condom wrapper.
Are there any rules against fucking the hot TA?
Maybe for her....
Her problem, not mine
Yeah I'm just gonna shower and drink a gallon of coffee and drunkenly write my research paper. It'll be fine
Stealing, and booze. If only you added meaningless sex with random people you would have wrapped all your life passions together
My ex's new girlfriends ex boyfriend is getting me my nipples pierced for Valentine's Day so who's the real winner here
she's pretty fucking smug for someone who has had unprotected sex with a convicted felon
My trash can is full of used condoms and girl scout cookie boxes.
I cannot believe all 4 of us had sex at the same time, in the same bed... And it didn't turn into a foursome..
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