my computer doesn't work...
why?
i puked on it last night
come outside for a special surprise it involves huge boobs
she was home schooled till college. were she learned how to give the most amazing blowjobs is still a mystery.
Remember that crazy chick I've been ignoring and said I wouldn't bang her again? Can we start that again part today?
if youre pregnant and ruin my spring break i'll never forgive you.
I've awoken at 3am again, in a night terror, just thinking about how big his dick was.
Just saw someone tackle someone else to the ground for their coors light; he's not getting back up.
Yea, now that Irene is hitting us stores aren't selling any alcohol; beer is now a precious commodity.
I feel like we had some profound moment last night, but I can't really recall much past your ass turning up the volume on the radio.
shes taking the breakup well, i walked in on her naked passed out wearing a turban with a bag of peanut butter choc chips in hand at 5 in the afternoon.
When you wake up, just ignore the mess in the bathroom. I'll take her home when I'm off work.
Hold your horses dude. Titty pics are a work of art.
Take off your clothes and see if he wants to have sex, that's a good way to find out
We just got busted fucking in the hammock by his roommate...I'm so out of here as soon as hes asleep....
My roommate randomally bought me two bags of pretzels. Worst "Sorry you can hear me fucking my boyfriend everynight" gift ever.
Truth. Though I have held steadfast to the notion while the rest of you wavered. I had faith in his homosexuality.
Randomize
