I got so drunk I pissed the bed last night. He still likes me. He's a keeper
He is a keeper. You on the other hand are not.
is it bad if my mug shot looks better than my profile picture?
Haha oh wow he'd be perfect. He's got everything MTV looks for in a real world cast member. Gay. Tool. From Methuen
She woke up 3 seperate times, each time she had a look of pure terror on her face, she had no clue where she was.
Someone tried to flush pizza down the toilet. Well, at least tried to
Im pretty sure at one point a very high you yelled, with actual tears in your eyes, "im not wrestling with you anymore, you dont respect my safe word!!"
The best part about passing out on the floor was the fact that when I pissed myself, I didn't piss the bed again.
Sorry bud. Having a shitty day because the GF broke up with my wife and I. We really liked her too
Man. Apparently I blacked out between the 4th margarita and my air mattress. Asleep in my jeans at 10pm. Mom outdrank me again.
Pooping with Eye of the Tiger playing. Not a single fuck shall be given.
All boys are excommunicated from my vagina until further notice.
How bad is it that I can say that this isn't the first time a married man, who is in the military, has tried to make me his mistress?
he was wearing pj pants, thank you for not letting me go home with him
The lady at the liquor store in my hometown just gave ran around the corner and gave me a hug when I came back from being gone for a couple months. My life is complete.
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