Just did shrooms. Don't feel shit! Wsasted 40 bucks on this! Nothing's happenig except for this little gnome on my shoulder and the couch is melting. Fuckin waste of money.
If someone cleans their bathroom and shaves their crotch for you you kinda have to admit the relationship to facebook
Ya well my good-girl image was pretty much blown when he found out I'm going to jail soon.
Sorry girl, my dick is like a rollercoaster. You only get a picture after you ride
I'm pretty sure my lung is caught on my rib. And I can't feel the left side of my face. Best. Sex. Ever.
Lets be real here, you loved it when I was on top. With and without the machete.
In that case, I'll try 2 find a date. But my options are AA friends or fuck buddies.
I broke my arm trying to do a hand stand in my shower to wash the hate out of my asshole.
Also I've decided that I'm buying the next friend of mine who is dumb enough to get married a live porcupine as a wedding present.
We got to the second bar and all he kept saying was "I'm on an alcohol safari!" Best 21st birthday ever.
(This is the second time ive been high enough to decide to run for office)
It's like weed even makes my glasses better. Everything is so bright and clear and beautiful!
Apparently "I licked it so now it's mine" doesn't apply to people
I need to pull it together. I just cried my eyes out to Master Chef Junior.
I burned my tit while he banged me and it was still the best kitchen sex EVER!!!
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