I missed Saved by the Bell this morning, but Ashley in a later episode of Fresh Prince is keeping the morning wood alive.
Motorboating on a tuesday night. not too shabby....
Dude sorry i couldnt seem to spell any words right in the texts i sent you last night
I felt like a fucking code breaker.
Jack off faster Americas best dance crew is beyonce themed
hot ketchup is not a substitute for marinara
the russians are downstairs with the vodka loudly proclaiming happy birthday america. i don't care if it's the fourth, i care that it's 9 am and they woke me up.
his profile picture is a blurry one of him holding a beer. i recognized him instantly.
We've been broken up for 7 months. His mom sent me a card with a brochure inside titled "How at Risk for STD's are you?"
it's 10:36pm. Do you know where your penis should be?
Is it mean to convince my old booty call she used me for sex so I can bang her again before I leave for Denver?
I found my hair extensions. They were in my hamper.
The sex was so bad. I kept sending people snapchats of my face during it.
Do you think blood ever gets sick of carrying all these drugs around?
Like, there are so many different things we make it do, and it just wants to settle down and be a one-drug fluid?
Stop reading WebMD high.
How do you explain to your kids that you met their mother well you were giving her a gynecological exam??
Sometimes self-care is taking a shot of vodka and moving on.
Randomize
