But I'm halfway naked in a seductive pose! I just want to get this right...
he's chasing his jose cuervo with hot tub water
i just lost my virginity for the 9th time. when will guys stop believing that nonsense line
I just saw a sign that said "STRIPPERS!!! As seen on Jerry Springer!". As if Springer is the highest honor. I'm pretty sure we're in south Georgia.
idk what id do withouhrh yoy btro
I don't think he understands the importance of corndogs. Or condoms for that matter.
so why was i the only one who woke up with ham stuck to my ass?
He was in Alberta for less than a week and is already banned from 6 bars. I fear for his general well-being over there.
is there a way to sugar-coat "shes in jail" when someone is texting me asking where their friend is?
You may be in san diego, but I just watched a guy in a wheelchair sing walking in memphis for karaoke. Check and mate.
This is going to be one of those "I can only do this high" classes
Why do you think she gets more guys?
well her prof pic is her in her bedroom looking hot and mine is me looking terrified while holding a giant spider at 6 flags, so there's that
hurry up this bar wont let me order big pitchers of beer for just myself
Was having relations of the behind variety with my girlfriend. Based on where we were at I could see myself in the bathroom mirror. You know I did the Patrick Bateman point and wink at the mirror and turned on sissudio by Phil Collins.
I hope. Last year I got lost in New Orleans and some guy named Cookie walked me home while I cried.
Randomize
