Oh i know my limit. 9 shots after i've given blood.
Making a drinking game out of jeopardy does not mean you studied..
Please don't let me drink ever again. I apparently told him he could stay but as there was no room in the bed he'd have to lie on top of me and he'd need to anchor himself on with his penis so he didn't fall off.
The cops said we could pay $250 or spend the night in jail and get 2 free meals. I might pee in mail-boxes more often
One of us will probably end up wearing nothing but glow/ neon body paint and a pair of water wings...
And I am in no way ashamed to say that it will most likely be me. I'm hoping for it actually.
We are a team. I lure them in with my tits, feed them enough alcohol to consider homosexuality, and hand them off to you.
You're the best wingman ever.
She kept throwing quarters at him and yelling "Goooaaallll!!" whilst taking her clothes off one by one. I'd say she had a good night
Omg one side of my Labia is asleep. Has that ever happened to you?
That shot was terrible
You were like one of those guys at carnivals that spit out fire..... Except it was throw up
idk the fact that her roommate had a sign that said "enter without knock, exit without cock" makes me really NOT want to go steal her pot.
I'm done being drunk I wish I could snap my fingers and be sober
He's like a computer from 2001 in a 2014 world. It just doesn't work. Lots of glitches.
my roommate woke me up with head. more awkward than it sounds.
are you fucking roseanne barr in there?
Gez, you make a couple noises and all of the sudden your the loud girl.
Randomize