Don't look now but I am in class with a mixed drink
Don't look now but my prof just asked me if I was drinking a screwdriver
My astrological sign? Vagitarius.
but there are maragaritas for $3 so that was all i needed to hear
I don't think anyone could emotionally handle a numb vagina.
It really ruins the moment when you have to ask to resend the nude pics.
I still don't understand how I went from crying to blowing you in like two minutes.
I pretty much just threw a bunch of clothes and my vodka in a bag..idk where I'm gonna end up tonight but I'm prepared.
Some advice...don't play drunk rock em sock em robots. With actual people. I have bruises EVERYWHERE.
Josh has a goal of being naked in every RAs room this year. He's already 3/11.
Yea dude. I'm gonna be the life of the party. THIS BITCH GETS DRUNK BY HERSELF
Sorry blacked out and lost my phone. Judging by the looks of my body I fought a cat and fell into a bush.
She was chasing her shots with beefaroni and I think I fell in love.
Probably yeah. I mean maybe one day we can be those friends that hang out naked. Not awkard at all.
Ya that dick wasn't worth burning a perfectly good pizza.
You live and learn.
I want to disappear from this job like a fart in the wind.💨
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