I cant believe you went over there and fucked her last night after everything you said
she invited me over to play the wii, it's not like i intended to
You KNEW her power was out...
Theres this fat girl in desperate need of the proactive factory in my class and as i watch her shovel food in her face I am struggling to not only keep down my meager lunch but also to stay straight. Eliza Dushku couldnt even get my flacid dick to move
Just woke up. I have a "Detective Jacob Arnold's" business card in my pocket.
just had sex in his gielfriend's bed, and puked all over it. i need to get out of here.
It was worth having to clean the cum stains out of the carpet.
Were taking tot shots. If toddlers could drink these are the size of shots they would take
i wish it would rain vodka just once. i have not puked yet bring it on
You can wear my underwear. It'll be like old times.
They wont sell alcohol here on election day! HOW THE FUCK DO THEY EXPECT ME TO ENJOY THE ELECTION SOBER?
What the hell do I have to give up to manifest a dick
Yeah, the email that I was sending to get an Escort for the weekend, copied and pasted to my boss, that should be interesting conversation, when I come back from Christmas vacation break.
He wore the same cologne as my orthodontist so all I could think about was how I hadn't worn my retainer in months
Just ate Panda Express. Fortune cookie had no fortune in it. I actually prefer this. Less broken dream potential.
I drank so much that my feet don't feel like my feet
She's so nice... She deserves all the dicks.
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