Youre a pretentious asshole and im not sure who you think you are. Get the hell over yourself and the self righteous culture snob image because its pretty obnoxious.
he is fucking friends with his exwife on facebook, but he defriends me after 3 dates? am i that crazy?
I am literally too baked to press the call button. How am I supposed to bone him?
Dude I still wanna know who I had sex with on new years eve
Where'd you guys get the alcohol from?
Oh. Some homeless guy we picked up from I-70. He bought us $400 worth of alcohol in exchange for a shower.
...... wtf.
How do guys with small dicks who cheat on their girlfriends get girlfriends!?!
Totally just locked myself outside of my house, in my robe, with the fedex man and a box of sex toys. Not my week.
They wouldn't let me hang out the sun roof and sing apple bottom jeans in the drive thru of hardee's i think i no longer like these ppl
My shoe was in my mailbox this morning. I can't stay sober today.
I have managed to reach the 'after meth poster look' before lunch here...
HE TRIED TO HIT ME WITH A CHAIR. Stoned video games are NOT happening again
We'll just charge in there, all pant less and fabulous demanding he give back her ferret.
On Tinder, guy asked me if I had ever been fucked by a Pokemon master. Needless to say I didn't respond.
I woke up hugging my purse and I found a business card in my underwear. How?
It's Jesse McGoddamn Cartney, the whole world sings that shit
Randomize
