is it weird that i feel like i won the break up because my status change got two comments and his got zero?
Lol i'z typing this with my 962 nose
962=my?
Yeah.i
I'm sitting in the drive through at Mcdonalds right now watching the workers pressure wash the vomit I left from last night.
He's been dancing to the same Rob Thomas album in his room for almost 8 hours now. Please never, ever bring extacy over here again.
He said "ride me pocahontas" while I was on top of him last night
Still not exactly sure how i unbolted your toilet from the ground.
we're almost there. Shes pounding on the car window telling the nurse whos on a smoke break to fuck off.
i threw up in a box in my own lap driving today.
Anne I just took two ambiens. I think my body is melting into my blow up bed. Like a stick of butter just slowly melting. And I'm alright. Don't be afraid. I'll be alright.
I cant believe they held hands while getting simultaneous bjs
Is it worth it to drive to a zoo with a high possibility of sex at said zoo?
You need to be more adventurous.
I am! Just not in a "I wanna get diseases" way
I need to start a penis folder so I stop "accidentally" showing people my junk. On a side note- St. Pattys penis was a hit, four leaf clover and all.
After we finished having sex, he drunkenly tried to hugh five me, farted, then accused me of stealing his socks.
I think I just got drunk texted by my psychiatrist
Randomize
