all I know is if I don't watch spice world right now there will be a firefight.
he asked me if i "normally slept like that" because i was curled up in a ball facing the wall. then he told me that i woke up in the middle of the night and said "oh my god. i forgot you were here." how did he not understand that i didn't want him in my bed.
we ate a 40 pack of string cheese and watched an entire washing machine cycle.
oh but the power of the cock will take you to places you never been..i flew to hawaii once to sleep witha chick
I have to overdose on valtrex I had a rough weekend.
went from writing my paper to watching obamas speech to crushing beers and singing springsteen in a crowd of 100 within 20 minutes. I love this country
He just kept screaming "I have democratic immunity" as the cops dragged him into the car.
There is a visibable outline from you in the grass. its you in the fetal position...
She made a roadhead CD. Can I marry her?
We were in the hot tub...he ate the pizza pocket directly out of my mouth
I told you, I don't give a SHIT about their music. I JUST. WANT. TO FUCK. THE BASSIST.
It makes me really sad that some people start their saturdays running or biking instead of with 3 shots of tequila, a sausage biscuit, freaks & geeks and 2 orgasms.
Grilled cheese and shark week. Unemployment done right.
Soooo you're telling me you support us groom's men giving lap dances to willing patrons?
Sorry. I was preoccupied thinking about penises
Randomize
