Ben affleck wants to be a US senator. Just thought you would puke with me
I justed realized that the word 'turd" is present in saturday
I'm not sure, 7-8, the last bit was a rush of at least three blended together. Basically you fucked me so stupid that I can't even recall the number of orgasms.
So you know, I'm making that my facebook status.
He ate me out on the balcony. My asian neighbors cats are judging me...ALL 3 OF THEM!!
I got pulled into the conversation by "she sleeps with everybody" then "she" involved sleeping with "cocks the size of a viva burrito"
When he was fat he reminded me of my high school best friend and I just wanted to hug him and hug him. Also, he's funny and humor is the fastest way into my pants after Doctor Who and liquor.
HE TRIED TO HIT ME WITH A CHAIR. Stoned video games are NOT happening again
The girl next to me looks like the young version of sara (bonnie hunt) in jumanji. I wanna be like PLAY THE GAME SARA!!!!"
I swear going to your house is like going to a strip club, no matter what happens I get glitter on me.
One day i'll wow you with artfully trimmed pubes.
I woke up with a cutting board and a bag of uncooked pasta next to me.
I don't know which is worse, the fact that his name is Kevin or the fact that he has a pornstache.
He's getting so into these sexts, I hate to tell him I'm fully clothes, watching Bring It On and eating chips and salsa.
If I had your ass I would rule the world
Ok. After that I think I'm going to drag queen jello wrestling if you would care to join.
Randomize
