So is it bad that I'm using this 21 year old for his hot bod and utter naivety?
No its what 21 year olds are made for
My parents showed me my IQ test from fourth grade, I'm shitting on my potential.
that girl from work that wants to bone me just said 'the last time i went this long without sex was in jail'. sup, red flag
Just now remembered singing Trashy Women at the reception. Not karaoke, just sang along with the mic I stole from the DJ. All while still in my dress drinking champagne from the bottle
I feel like someone kicked me repeatedly in the ribs. I don't think sex is supposed to do that.
If I showed up at your door with pizza and a bottle of tequila wearing nothing but chaps and a fireman helmet, would you send me away?
They only searched every other person. But I sacrificed myself to get our vodka across the border
Sorry I sent you a video of a singing reverend last night, I was really high.
I might run out into oncoming traffic. Id rather break my legs and/or die then continue with today.
We should try to put a bagel on your penis
I just dropped a condom on the floor at costco in front of my girlfriend and her husband. Today is not going to go well.
Idk what's worse.... Yesterday not waking up in my bed or today waking up in the hello kitty gown.
Did you clean my apartment?
I thought it was a dream, I'm sorry
Please stay more often
I was supposed to see Marcus tonight and he cancelled. Listen, I shaved my butt hole. Somebody is getting this WAP 😂😂😂😂
The same idiot-bubble, now just bigger and louder.
Randomize
