okay pat passed out under dana's car
I've come to the conclusion that if I was an old man, I would perve around in short gym shorts for kicks.
All she gave me for breakfast was raw toast. How can she expect me to eat raw toast?
You mean bread?
in the middle of it he kept shouting: im going to be masturbating to this for the rest of my life
The fact you even thought licking it would fix it boggles my mind
Well it worked
Not the point
His hands were made for my vagina.
I really wish you were half the slut you're sister was in college
I feel like I should lick our pitcher just so everyone knows its ours
Saw on the news tonight that Hamilton county's syphilis rate is 9x the national average...use protection!
Thanks, mom.
Well, I want to see you regardless of whether or not you will lick whipped cream off my body.
time for you to cut the loving, understanding, non-judgmental crap and say/do whatever it takes to make sure I never, ever, ever sleep with him again ever
I have a fantastic sense of humor but being called a merman isn't funny
It took years to build this empire of casual fuckings and not carings.
This week I fucked a police officer and called both the Senators from the state I'm in and the one I'm moving to. What have you done since the election?
Call me Sherlock Holmes, bitch.
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