Anywhere you can eat green eggs and ham, you can have sex.
whatever sunny in Philadelphia does on Thursday nights, I'm doing all weekend.
He has that cheese in a can and he's eating it. I have never seen that outside a goofy movie.
There's nothing more uncomfortable than drifting into sexual fantasies on a roadtrip and realizing you have a boner with three other dudes in the car.
For sure. We should see if we can get Mike to pay for one, and have a triple kegger... :o==& (that's future me projectile vomiting. i try to be goal oriented)
drinking out of a sandbucket again
Don't underestimate her when she starts going by "the vodka queen"
I don't have any money, so I'm just gonna press my boobs against him for his birthday.
We thought it was a good idea to send a picture to our HS science teacher where she's smoking a joint and I'm holding a monkey, and he invited us to lunch. NEW LEVEL UNLOCKED.
I can't. I'm not drunk enough for this information.
Your birthday is now over. Your day in the spotlight has dimmed and now you're as special as everyone else. The world goes back to revolving around me. Good night.
When confronted with a choice of going home or fucking the band ALWAYS FUCK THE BAND!!
Okay so how much boob would you consider inappropriate for smart casual?
I just had sex a few hours ago now i'm eating frozen yogurt making sex plans for tonight while catching Pokémon. What a time to be alive.
It took him 15 minutes to put the condom on.
Wait. How did I get engaged last night?
Randomize
