I just ate a cockroach and I want to be a fire truck.
Hands down the best time I've ever had barfing.
New dating criteria: what kind of ex will this person be?
I just randomly started counting the number of guys that I've hooked up with that are now gay. 11.
He has a really nice penis but its like a model that wasn't built to scale
Okay well someone asked "IS HE HOMELESS?" about me so I need to try and find somebody.
He tells me he loves me and I say I just want him for sex, then he looks at me like I just said I hate puppies. What kind of guy is he?
The taxi driver was going on about how many drunk chicks want to sleep with him when he drives them home. Not sure if he was bragging or hinting
Am I allowed to be in denial about being gay again? Or is that one of those things you can't do?
Just had to kick my 26 yr old boyfriend out of my bed before getting the kids up for school. Have I mentioned being 41 doesn't suck as much as all the hype.
He's bringing a lesbian pretending to be his girlfriend to family Christmas. I can not wait to see how this goes.
it'll be like a game of Russian Roulette, but with my vagina.
I wasn't supposed to sleep w him. So of course I sent him gps location to my bed.
If there was a gecko involved in your BDSM I'm gonna have to request that not happen when we live together ;)
Yep. Just fucked a 34 year old on the football field where we both went to high school. That's a story for the grandkids.
Randomize
