Spotted: jayne dropping her cigarettes in a puddle...then picking them back up and putting them in her pocket. If i ever get that desperate, stop talking to me
It's just like soggy cereal, but cancerous
Wait, how do girls masturbate?
I dunno we use shower heads I guess.
..how does it fit?
i found her half dressed with her feet in the washer..she said it was sooo warm.
Well technically because of daylight savings, I only lasted 15 mintues.
Please get rnbert tn get chebk h'm in i'm no dead when he getr gome
I was informed last night that im not allowed to pick up the bouncers and carry them around anymore. Last sat is starting to make more sense
I have a gash on my leg an a lobster leg in my purse.
Bone him for me, BONE HIM TWICE FOR ME.
The liquor stores are closed! NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO! CURSE YOU SANDY!!!!
I saw that you sent me a photo and the first thing out of my mouth was "I swear if it's another photo of a dick poking out of a bubble bath"
Got dumped. Now accepting nominations for my extra Dave Mathews ticket. No xboyfriends. Must cast final votes by Monday. Good luck everyone
If there's one thing i learned from edward 40hands is that i couldnt handle life with bottles for hands
This morning i put band aids over my nipples bc i was too lazy to put on a bra. Think I've reached a new low.
I WOULD SERIOUSLY RECOMMEND THE SHIT THAT I AM ON RIGHT NOW
I kinda realized titty fucking is purely for our enjoyment, they dont really get much out of it, except for a guy sitting on them and and a dick bouncing of their chin
Randomize
