honey bunches of taint.
do you ever facebook stalk someone so much you think their inside jokes are yours?
So how do we make 4/20 better than every other day we are stoned?
Replacing day drinking with a real job was the worst decision I've ever made.
you asked "if this appropriate to take the the bathroom?" while holding up a bottle of vodka when you went to pee.
We are having a competition to see who can masterbate in the wierdest place, right now hes winning since he masterbated on his Jr. High school bus.
We were on the balcony tossing jello shots to people passing below
When people said no i'd yell "i tried them i promise they aren't roofied!"
I was fine until "Under Pressure" came on the radio. It's like God wanted me to shit my pants on the drive home.
They drank shots out of my cleavage. Surprisingly, the one who did the best was a gay guy.
I've said it before and I'll say it again: your tits are a danger to gay men everywhere.
It's official, I need to start putting my vagina's needs before my own.
im actually so stoned and hungover i feel like a bag of jello stuffed into a human shape
Vodka drinking games. Where you wake up next to a douche lord and see your thong in the blinds.
I did this clutch move yesterday at the bar where I grabbed a plastic cup for water and discreetly threw up in it while walking around and then tossed it. It was my best boot and rally ever
If I had your ass I would rule the world
I might have to quit marching band. It's affecting my drinking schedule
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