And then I chipped his tooth because I got too into it. Helloo, single life.
i noticed he has a cardboard window on his car and he told me he locked his keys in his car and had to break in...this only makes him more appealing
Walking back from greek row alone at 3:30am in a child's kangaroo suit...not my proudest moment
still finding ketchup in my shoes. thanks to graduation that is probably the last time ill ever say that..
So I think before Superbowl weekend begins we should all take a look back on last year and learn from our pitfalls... AKA no touchdown shots and kitchen crying.
How was your 8:30 class today?
Non existent. I just threw up in my water bottle on the bus.
I believe nudity is frowned upon at that establishment
And there was a legally blind kid in a ref costume doing surprisingly well at beer pong who was passing out business cards
Talking to friends parents while buying all the things needed for Jell-O shots. classic
Mom called her a cunt. I think that's code for "don't bring her over ever again."
Ya. My thumbs are those buffalo's, but my legs are spirits and my torso is that Indian guys and my head is the eagle
There is someone out there for you right now. And we will find her. Or him. Her. Her, we'll start with tits.
Vodka and cigarettes aside, my body is a temple.
He fingered me to the beat of the Fresh Prince theme song... it was pretty fantastic.
Hey guys.. So I accidentally broke the front door last night
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