You tried to wear your Jesus costume into Family Christian stores and say it was a book signing.
All I know is that we apparently made a drink we named The Single Girl which is rum, vodka, grain alcohol, and sprite and rolled around in the backyard.
At one point in time, he cried and said I didn't appreciate him.
He was puking up tons. He aimed his face inside his coat. Not a drop in my car. Then he thanked me for the ride.
My time here is complete. I think I have now thrown up in every major degree programs building
I filled this oven with as much Pizza as I could, and I've been eating out of it for three days.
Just ate the last piece. Refilling the oven.
Serious question...Is it possible to get a DUI on a kayak?
I shit you not ... they just advertised a recruiting service for strippers at this concert.
This girl braided my pubes while i was asleep. Now i cant get them undone.
I remember caressing his hands asking him if he moisturized, then i proceeded to put his hands on my face
I did coke with the Royal Navy last night. God save the queen.
It's a mix of hot dirty sex and week old bong water
so the casino kicked my ass last night, i'm pretty sure i hit a new level of hungover....just showered with my sunglasses on because the bathroom light is too bright
We both shit in the same closet in Santa Fe. Nothing is sacred anymore.
Pandemic Silver Lining: cheap hotel rates makes it easier to have afternoon fun with my side dick
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