Send those Picts to my email please. From last night
Ps thx for the porn on my phone
;) ur welcome
we hooked up on one of my student's desks last night...i can't decide if i'm ashamed or massively proud of myself
dude you teach first grade wtf
At least he's not married... I hate Halloween hookups
Its not christmas eve unless I give him head. I wont take no for an answer
One date. That's all it took. I want to have his geunis babies in me. One date.
The good news is I managed to avoid the three cop car looking for me. The bad news is I no longer have shoes.
Dreamed I made out with a stranger after falling out of a car, let's make this happen tonight.
Also what is the name of Americas thing where we had a holy obligation to expand westward? I'm going name my new lighter that.
Just once I'd like to do blow in a nice bathroom.
Matt just ate a burger out of the trash can in front of the McDonalds. We need to have a serious talk about his drinking.
I know you're my sister, but I'm pretty sure I'm going to have sex with one of your exes this weekend. He's probably not gay, but I'll let you know.
I also got a mission for you and you're gonna love it. Biggest. Hospital. Party. Ever.
you fail at everything in life besides blacking out
I know you want to take a pregnancy test, but could you wait until Sunday so it doesn't ruin our weekend
Holy. shit. Chris has no pants on. In public. Fuck. Need you.
Randomize