I wish I could punch you in the face.
I need a slap back to reality. Or at least a slap back to homosexuality
would you ever date a girl who drove an 89 Chrysler LeBaron? - for the record it's a convertable
she was screaming in french about how classy it was to be drinking wine. oh... she was drinking it out of the bottle. with a beer in her other hand while throwing up.
i guess its officially winter break. i woke up alone and fully clothed this morning.
A kid wearing a Batman belt buckle in my psych class just asked how people get pee fetishes. I'm too high for this.
words of advice: black light parties reveal cum stained clothing.
No dude, you can't hot box a bus shelter.
he told me he had a problem with me going both ways. like what the fuck. what guy says that to a girl? goodbye planned threesomes...
Apparently getting dressed is an all-day activity.
Im glad the only reason we got out of bed today was to get Halloween candy on sale.
I'm getting kicked out of the place we're at. They don't like ketchup on their walls..
Life Epiphany- I need to have children so I can be the drunk grandma at family functions. Its my destiny.
You're not gonna like every guy whose dick I put in my mouth
Your the only girl I know that carries a $1100 purse with tater tots inside
Randomize