i think i've said "don't judge me" 10+ times tonight... is that a bad thing?
yes
... don't judge me
Why is it that you only get to have sex when you haven't shaved your legs in six weeks and are wearing period stained granny panties?
He was on Keeping Up with the Kardashians it was like a deed from god to bang him
The whole movie was ruined when some chick started laughing with what you could tell was QUITE the mouthful. This of course made the guy laugh harder.
Suddenly I feel like all I did this summer was have sex in our apartment
You might call them booze related cuts, I call it "partying so hard you sweat blood"
Is this a drinking picnic?
Is there another kind?
I just explained my sex life to the "if you give a moose a muffin" book... Is that weird?
Now when you said you'd never sleep with me, did you really mean never on a Monday or never without handcuffs or a blindfold or never on a airplane or never without lots of booze? Cus never is a pretty strong word.
Before we have sex for the first time I would like "eye of the tiger" to be playing to mentally prepare me for what I'm about to endure.
You yelled "Everybody!!! Round of applause to Jill for not doing anal!!" Right in front of him.
But you put your finger in my ass and the rest is history
I'm not a whore anymore. I gave up 90% of my women for you. I'm a 4-5 woman kind of guy now.
I just recommended that the library purchase the first major hentai with tentacle porn. Really, I'm doing everyone a favor.
They stopped fighting to partake in M&Ms and porn.
Randomize
