the thought of Anne Coulter teabagging Dick Cheney kills me everytime.
It took my four years to get this degree, and 4 hours to lose it, My parents are not impressed.
I'm not giving my ex her earrings back. If some chick i hated gave me brownies i would still eat them. It's the same thing.
Wackin it to the USA womens soccer team. My own personal way of saying job well done.
Apparently he crashed because 3 different girls were trying to give him road head at the same time.
Blacked out last night, but left myself a note that said "oops on oops on oops" that can never be a positive
I may or may not have traded your body to the rodeo's owner for free beer.
Trust me. Drunk Scrabble is not a good idea. Arguments over the legitimacy of the word "Pickle" break out, things are said, friendships are ruined. It's ugly.
On my way to get pizza I followed a dog into Salvation Army where I was just hired
I'm pretty sure I imagined the dog... They still hired me
its the first football sunday and my boyfriend isn't excited. this isn't gonna last unless he makes me snacks and brings me beer during the game.
I mean I just feel if I'm not being fat and lazy then I'm not really being myself
I just called my boyfriend "Dad"... Awkward
What do I do with all this pork broth? I can't waste it.
CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG
One of the guys just came in and goes "i walked all the way home with a pumpkin". Night just got better.
I don't know why this person would ask for help. It sounds pretty OK to me. Also, I'd steal those bagpipes.
Randomize
