wrigley field is MILF paradise
i think i have two assholes
I can't belive they dont sell booze Sunday mornings. I mean some of us have to work
Wow... that's disturbing man, and their not even my balls
I think i can make this amish girl legitimately hot.
I'm thinking we can stop tracking my sex life by the hotels I've hooked up in and instead use bar bathrooms I've gotten head in.
That's just a really flattering way of saying, "Yes, you're useless, but you have great tits."
I've honestly never felt so much emotion towards a wall
If you take a post shower shit just get back in bed. You're better off starting your whole morning all over again.
I went to Christian school in the 90s. I can finger blast anything, but dignity.
did you call me last night and say you were being kidnapped?
Some guy is here to get laser hair removal on his balls. I hate my job.
i'll explain later but cookie monster is playing the xylophone
i let a mormon finger me. i don't ever want to be that drunk again.
Longest 30 seconds of my life
10/10 so not recommended
Randomize