Can I ask u a weird question?
Sure
do u have the hershy squirts too?
Sometimes I get depressed that my son is too young to understand how hot his babysitter is.
My complete lack of self respect has really improved my blow job technique
no drinking for a week
if by week you mean tonight and by no you means yes
I might have hooked up with a 2003 alumni last night in the basement
Dude you were ten when he graduated
Wahoowaaaaaaa
Rainbow fish was a wild success, got wasted at 6 gave away most my scales and made out with max from where the wild things are.You'd be so proud
He told me that his favorite part about me is hearing my voice while we fuck. I think that was the nicest thing he has EVER said to me.
We are trying to penis chicken awkward them out. But I think it's a gay wedding. Backfiring. Heavily.
... and smoked a joint with my new landlord. I'm starting to like Germany.
i was asked to be gay of honor by three different girls and NONE of the groomsmen at any of the weddings is open to experimenting. i mean whats the point then.
he told me he didn't like my name so he was going to call me Casey instead
I mean, we were all drinking, but I'm pretty sure kidnapping came up.
Just for once I'd like my first interaction with a new GP to not be an obvious sex injury.
let your parents know i'm sorry i ran around the house pretending their metal detector was a "booze detector"
Don't send me pics of cunning dicks while I'm eating potato chips
Randomize
