She was like a white Oprah, but with less conviction.
You and your empty threats of no sex. Like.u.cud.hold.out.
I love my bros weed
Im gonna hate it in like 20 mins though
Drunk and had dance off with 8 year old. Lost. Still drinking
he asked me if i wanted "a hit" off his inhaler. its definitely time for a new roommate
even iPhones love lady gaga. everytime I type haha it trys to correct it to gaga. this is bullshit...
i wish that every time i slipped on a sheet of ice i had the ability to recover with a michael jackson move
Well my dea agent brother is visiting so I'm gonna get high and see if he notices
I just dropped macaroni right down my cleavage. For the sake of our future, I'm really banking on this being a turn on for you.
the last guy with this job had a bookshelf fall on him. He's in the Er. Im high and they gave me his shift. How do you think i feel?
I just sent you a multitude of sexual pictures...and you responded with a Charles Dickens Quote.
We hooked up with 2 friends last night as always and she stole their fucking cocaine and I just had to drive to their house and make her give it back to him hahshshahahah only me
well i mean, we just followed them into an alien and astronaut party. there was tin foil everywhere
It is a bad day indeed when you learn that your boy toy looks better in your dresses than you do
And how about the fact that the first time i really truly looked at a guy's dick was in my car. MY CAR. GODDAMNIT!!!
Randomize
