haha i think we're both just down to be fuck buddies..but i do have a hickey and a bit of a big lip and fucking burns on my knees..note to self hooking up on a golf course is NOT that exciting
I could tell by the way he was holding my hand that he really liked you
My professor just suggested making the state of the union more interesting by turning it into a drinking game. Brilliant!!
ARE YOU ALIVE? usually when i say lets start drinking at inappropriate times you come right over. im worried
Have you ever tried running while drinking 151?
Also while I am being the bigger person I plan on bringing over something strong smelling and/or alcoholic to torture the poor hungover bastard
Oh god. Standing was a rash decision
I made it to Starbucks to do work and I've just been sitting here with my head on the table for 30 minutes...
Just so were clear I meant the head your face is on
no im not bringing booze its easy, you just challenge a drunk guy to beer pong, he'll hand you two beers, you lose on purpose, and everyone makes fun of you. but we laugh in the end for bringing nothing to a byob
Like there's an 87% chance I'll end up on the bedroom floor demanding sex while freestyling in your face. I'm going to buy rum.
Dude are you being arrested? I swear I just saw you laying on the hood of your car with a cop patting you down...
Trying to do the walk of shame over here WHY are there a hundred ppl on the el?! Thank god I pulled a summit and wore casual clothes I even stopped by the farmers market and bought some squash
I want to get up and tell you that smells delicious but I'm struggling with the idea of pants
I broke her handcuffs. I feel like an animal.
Wait, cocaine is okay but tanning isn't?
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